To All a Goodnight…

5/29 14 months old

Defy Aster

Astral Defiance

14 months old

Whew…This month has flown by. I struggled all month to get a post up, but I REFUSE to let a month go by without updating this blog at least once. There are so many reasons I strive to keep the blog going, but the most important reason for this blog is to combat all the misinformation out there about veganism. Vegans can easily have healthy pregnancies, healthy children and healthy lives. Astral and Defy are proof of this. They are the best examples, times two!

There are a lot of people who read this blog from all over the world and every time I check the stats I feel an ever-growing responsibility, even with limited time. Almost every time I find a new vegan parenting, family or pregnancy blog I am disappointed with what I read and see. I just want to find consistent vegan, no-compromise messages out there, but there are few and far in between when it comes to children, pregnancy and families.

As I write my eyes are red and itchy from being outside in the 100 degree, pollen filled air at lunch. As I have said before, I hope Astral and Defy DO NOT inherit mommy’s allergies. Maybe this can be my excuse for ranting a bit. I never usually use this blog as a platform for complaints, but sometimes you just have to let it out.

Breathe out…

Our little guys are now 14 months old, though they will be turning 15 months in 3 days. Astral and Defy continue to learn new things at record speeds. The amount of objects, animals, people, etc they can identify is amazing. In addition to constantly pointing out things and explaining what is going on around them, we use flash cards and books to teach them new items. I think there is a lot to say for the no television rule. These kids are always engaged and never pacified by the magical branding machine. For 14 month olds they have a great amount of patience and are very observant. The boys are still a little shy at first with new people, but they are warming up faster and faster as time goes by.

With the scorching temperatures comes pool season! The boys have been thoroughly enjoying outdoor water play. They love playing outside, going on long stroller adventures and walking around the neighborhood with daddy. Recently walking indoors and out has morphed into very fast, reckless running which has led to various minor injuries. In one week we had a busted lip and chin. For the lip debacle I totally panicked and almost drove to the ER, but Lucas always the voice of reason calmed me down and everything turned out fine. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to the bumps, bruises or scrapes…

DnA continue to eat an amazing vegan diet and have added even more new foods. I’m sure I’m forgetting something on the yummy new foods list, but here goes:
Swiss Chard
Cantaloupe
Sugar Snap Peas
Watermelon
Cucumbers

Grapes
Tahini
Black Strap Molasses
Papaya
Tamari
Canola Oil
Romaine Lettuce

We are gearing up for the second plane trip with the boys in the next couple of weeks. NOT EXCITED. This time we don’t have business class seats with the extra room. The boys were just learning to walk the last plane trip so obviously now they are way more mobile. We will be bringing lots of snacks and distractions. Wish us luck!!!

Astral and Defy are obsessed with the children’s book we read to them before bed. We both read the book out loud to them in unison in silly singsong voices. The very last page reads “Goodnight!” so now of course every time we get to the last page the boys say, "GUH-NIE". They are so adorable greeting the mornings with "hehwo wohd" and ending the nights with "guh-nie". Little things like this make all the bathroom totally drenched after bath-time, oatmeal in your hair and on your clothes right before you walk out the door to the office, random cry fest in the middle of the store moments of parenting so worth it…

Astral and Defy Walk...

@ cosmo's vegan shoppe (42 weeks)

47 weeks (1/27/11)

46 weeks

44 weeks

43 weeks - 10 months old

42 weeks

Astral 42 weeks - officially walking!

Happy New Year! I know it’s been a while…

As you imagine we have been extra busy raising our sweet vegan twinsies! I haven't blogged since December, but I am determined to get a post logged for January. I have less than 2 hours left so here goes.

Our amazing little Astral and Defy will be 11 months in 3 days. So much has happened since the last blog post! The most exciting news is that Astral and Defy now walk!!!!!! Can you believe it? Astral took 3 steps when we were in Atlanta over “the holidays”, then a few days later he took 7 and never looked back. Defy launched off about a week or so after Astral! It is super entertaining to watch them toddle around the house. Astral was walking while still 9 months old and Defy when he had just hit 10 months. They are truly outstanding and already have us chasing after them like crazy…

The boys had their first plane ride in December and to our surprise were absolutely great flyers. They didn’t cry at all. They were complete angels. And to think I had nightmares about uncontrollable screaming among other scary things before the trip! We upgraded to business class on both flights so that we’d have more room and also so that we could sit next to one another. In economy seating there is only one extra oxygen mask in each little seat section so they have restrictions prohibiting more than one lap baby in each section.

When we were in Georgia we got a chance to hit up Cosmo's Vegan Shoppe’s (http://www.cosmosveganshoppe.com/) storefront to pick up some awesome vegan goodies. There is nothing better than going in to a store where you know everything is vegan! We were able to meet Leigh, one of the owners. We love supporting vegan owned businesses...

All of DnA’s milestones seem to progress so fast! Their next well baby check up is in March when they turn 1. It will be so interesting to see how much they’ve grown!

They already seem to have their own language and unique way of communicating. They only say Mama and Dada, but I imagine they say a lot more to one another.

They are always switching personalities on us, Defy is in the bully stage right now where he steals Astral’s toys away and then holds whatever it is up in the air to show it off. He is really good at defense too. Astral was the brother bully for a long while, but all of a sudden they've reversed roles. When they aren't fighting over toys (many of which they have double of) they are the best of buds and show great affection for one another. Sometimes while they play they sit back to back. It is seriously the sweetest thing EVER! I hope they remain best friends for life!

The boys are eating more nutritious, organic vegan foods and enjoy their finger foods almost as much as Star and Sunny, who are very happy to wait to see what treats come falling down to them while the boys eat in their high chairs! We are still waiting a few days in between introductions to watch for possible allergies. The most recent foods we've added to their diet include:

Brown Rice Snaps (crackers – only ingredient brown rice flour)

Brown Rice Cakes (only ingredient brown rice)

Brown Rice Pasta (only ingredient brown rice flour)

Puffed Brown Rice Cereal (only ingredient puffed brown rice)

Black Eyed Peas

Pineapple

Red Skin Potatoes

Tofu

Oatmeal

Blackberries

White Button Mushrooms

Tomatoes

Garbanzo Beans (Chick Peas)

There is so much joy ahead and so much behind. In February Lucas and I will have been partners for 9 years. In August we will celebrate our 5th year of marriage. It is so interesting to look back at our lives then in comparison to what they’ve become. Time has flown by and this year is no exception, it is almost unbelievable that in a month our babies will be 1. Being parents has changed our lives profoundly and there is nothing that can compare with the love and happiness that Astral and Defy bring to our lives…

We've Come A Long Way...

DnA's lovely cribs that we hope they sleep in again!

Nice organic bedding, what baby wouldn't want to sleep here?? OURS!!

35 weeks

33 weeks

The boys are 37 weeks now (8 months old). They seem to be getting prepared to walk. Astral is standing unassisted for 30 seconds and has taken a step followed by falling! Defy can stand unassisted for about 10 seconds before falling!!! They both like holding on to their baby gate and cruising around. A & D love music and will dance to any beat.

The twinsies are also in love with our furry companions, Star and Sunny! They follow them around and love playing with and petting them. The relationship is beautiful. They are just amazing and joyful little guys!

They each have the same exact 8 teeth, 4 on top and 4 on bottom. They enjoy getting their teeth brushed with their tiny little baby toothbrushes. They are just too freaking cute!

Astral and Defy have eaten several more foods including; yams, peas, mangoes, peaches, pears, lentils and quinoa (all organic of course). I can’t say they all were a big hit, but you are supposed to keep trying. They both can drink out of their sippy cups now. I only put a small amount of water in them so that they can practice drinking without filling up and spoiling their appetites.

The boys love bath time and splash and play like crazy. We have tried giving them baths together, but that seems to still be a little too dangerous and chaotic. We will try again when they are a little bigger.

Since the weather has been getting colder, I've been shopping for warm, VEGAN and organic winter coats or bunting. I can't find anything that actually looks like it would keep them warm. They are in 12 month clothes already. Bundling up will probably work while they aren't walking, but I have a feeling they will walk this winter. If any one has any suggestions please let us know!

Last week Astral had Roseola, the exact same virus Defy had in October (fever with no other symptoms followed by a rash lasting 3 days). I guess we should just be thankful that it wasn’t anything more serious and 1 virus for each baby in 8 months isn’t nearly as bad as it could be. Once a child gets the virus they are usually immune and won’t get it again. Astral weighed 21 lbs 5 oz. when we took him to the pediatrician because of the fever. They are both so big for their age and so advanced in their milestones! WE love proving all the negative vegan myths WRONG! Can't wait to get both of their stats at their big 9 month check up in December.

About 2 months ago we brought the boys in our bed while they were teething and had stopped sleeping through the night. It was easier for me because they both wanted to comfort nurse and I wanted them to feel secure during their tough time. I originally wanted to follow the attachment parenting style and co-sleep before I found out we were having twins. Now that the boys are bigger we aren’t as scared to have them sleep with us. We really like having the family bed (dogs included), but now that the boys are waking less during the night we really want to try to get them back in their nursery in their own cribs. It is lovely to wake up to their smiling faces and have the comfort of feeling them breathing next to us, but honestly it is very hard to get sound sleep with them in bed. We plan on beginning the transition (yes…again) this weekend. Wish us luck…

It is so strange to think that last year around this time I was prepping to leave my office and go on full time bed rest at 24 weeks pregnant and now I have 2 healthy and rapidly growing baby boys. I practically missed all winter last year being hospitalized from December 28th until March 5th. The seasonal transition has brought back a lot of memories from our pregnancy. I would do it all again to get Astral Defiance and Defy Aster…

Having "The Choice"...

Although friends, family, and medical professionals have generally been accepting and supportive of Kenya and I raising Astral and Defy as vegans, there have been some people who subtly (and not so subtly) suggest that we are depriving them of the choice to exploit and kill other animals later in life. These people have posed questions in ways that made it seem as if they were genuinely concerned about Astral and Defy's freedom of choice to exploit and kill whomever they want as if, without doing so, they will live a joyless life of constant deprivation that we have selfishly imposed upon them.

"What if they really want to eat (animal product X) when they are old enough to make the choice? Will you let them?" is a common "concern" that we encounter. Or the question has been framed this way: "But what if they choose to eat at (chain restaurant/fast food establishment X) when they're older? Will you be OK with that?" We spoke with one individual about how Astral and Defy will not be wearing popular name-brand shoes made from the skin of cows, and this individual very politely and curiously asked, "but they'll have the choice to wear leather when they're older, right?" And then there was a heated exchange with another individual about the ethics of veganism. This individual quickly became very hostile, pointed at our boys and exclaimed, "but you're taking away their choice to eat whatever they want!"

So the question posed is: Will Astral and Defy have the choice to not be vegan when they are old enough to make decisions for themselves? Before answering, let's examine the question, shall we?

First of all, those of us who speak of exploiting and killing other animals as merely a personal choice do not seem to understand the ideology of speciesism. It has been forced upon us by our parents or guardians just as it was forced upon them, and it has been, and is being, constantly reinforced by our society and its institutions. This is the reason that many of us believe that humans are not animals, that humans are naturally superior to all other animals, that other animals are “stupid”, that other animals are here for humans to use as we please, that there is no moral problem whatsoever with using and killing other animals, that humans need to consume other animals to survive, etc. These are not beliefs we developed on our own. As young children many of us were fascinated by other animals and naturally had compassion and empathy for them. Some of us considered them to be our equals. As adults, even after a life of reinforced speciesist indoctrination, most of us claim to love and/or respect other animals and do not want to harm them, especially when it is unnecessary to do so. However, most of us choose to actively participate in the exploitation and killing of other animals on a daily basis for completely unnecessary purposes such as eating them, wearing them, or using them for entertainment. Therefore, it seems that choosing to actively participate in the exploitation and killing of other animals is the result of our being thoroughly conditioned to believe that it is a “normal” and morally justifiable thing to do, not because it actually reflects our values or personal ethics.

Furthermore, questions about having a personal choice to exploit and kill other animals are based on the assumption that no one else is affected by that choice. This is incorrect and relies on the speciesist belief that other animals do not have minds capable of experiencing the distress, pain, and suffering inherently caused by their exploitation. It is also incorrect because choosing to participate in the exploitation of other animals concurrently results in the exploitation and harm of human beings and the destruction of the planet we all depend on for our survival.

Finally, there is a common misconception that vegans, by opting out of the systematic exploitation of other animals, are somehow depriving themselves of otherwise unattainable enjoyment. But being vegan is not a restrictive way of living at all. For instance, a diet consisting of fruit, vegetables, seeds, beans, grains, nuts, mushrooms, herbs, and spices has proven to be much more varied, satisfying, and healthful than the one I was eating when I was not a vegan. And does anyone reading this essay really need to wear popular name-brand shoes made from cow skins? There are plenty of other materials out there such as hemp, canvas, recycled plastics, recycled rubber, and synthetics. Does anyone reading this essay really need to continue eating other animals or wearing any clothing made from the bodies of other animals at all? Most importantly, how can we justify the exploitation and killing of other animals merely for the sake of enjoyment?

Now I'd like to return to the question of Astral and Defy having the choice to not be vegans when they are old enough to make their own decisions. Will they have the choice?

The short answer is yes, they will have the choice to not be vegan when they are old enough to decide for themselves. We will certainly not force them to do anything when they can make their own educated choices, but we will in no way facilitate or condone any non-veganism.

Now for the long answer...

My feeling is that all caring and concerned parents or guardians raise their children in a way that is consistent with their own values. Not many parents or guardians would, for instance, admit to teaching their children that it is acceptable to physically violate another human being (and perhaps even the valued domesticated animals in our society, such as dogs and cats) just because it might be enjoyable. Most of us teach our children that this kind of conduct is ruled out from the start no matter what psychological or material gains would be derived from it. However, our children will still technically have the choice to participate in the exploitation and/or killing of another human, or participate in any other activity we parents or guardians find objectionable, when they are old enough to make their own decisions to do so. It is only when we speak of other animals that it becomes an acceptable personal choice to exploit and kill them, and this is a direct result of our speciesist indoctrination.

Veganism, on the other hand, is a challenge to the deeply rooted beliefs that have developed as a result of our speciesist indoctrination. Based on the principle of non exploitation, veganism is philosophically in opposition to the oppressive arrangements humans have long maintained with each other and with other animals. Although Kenya and I have the choice to participate in the exploitation of other animals on a daily basis, we simply try our very best not to because, like humans, other animals are morally significant and have interests in living their lives on their own terms. We owe it to them to be vegan; it is the very least we can do if we take their interests seriously.

People who present us with "the choice" question really do not seem to understand that Astral and Defy will be raised in a way that actively challenges speciesism. They will be raised as vegans and their choices will be guided by vegan principles. This means that, unlike the vast majority of humans on Planet Earth, they will not be taught to see other animals as food, clothing, or any other means to human ends but rather as fellow autonomous sentient beings with intrinsic value.

Given the fascination Astral and Defy already have with other animals, and considering the joy they get from seeing the other animals they've already met, they appear to be well on the vegan path all on their own.

And We Have Teeth...

Astral and his two teeth!!

Defy and his one tooth!

25 weeks old

24 weeks

23 weeks old

22 weeks old

Yikes!! I have been seriously slacking on the posting, but as you can imagine life is pretty busy these days! Astral and Defy are becoming more and more mobile and require entertaining! The boys are the center of our universe and so much fun, especially compared to the eating, sleeping and pooping cycle of a newborn.

The boys are 25 weeks old and will be 6 months old in 4 days! Half of a year, it seems like just yesterday they entered our lives. DnA are barely recognizable from their former tiny selves. They are fully animated, strong and very vocal.

In the past 2 weeks they have come one step closer to being able to chew the yummy vegan food they'll be raised on! Little brother Defy sprouted his first tooth and then a few days later, not to be outdone, big brother Astral sprouted 2! They are the cutest little bottom teeth ever. At around 4 months they started drooling and chewing on their hands a lot so we knew it was coming, but we didn't realize how soon. Defy and Astral were both a little more fussy right before the teeth popped up and also the day they first appeared. It seemed to happen overnight. We give them cornstarch and frozen silicon teething rings and they also really love chewing on organic stuffed vegetables and fruits toys. We haven't given them unnecessary drugs and they are just fine. Astral really wanted to be held by me and no one else during this time, I was his all natural remedy! Thankfully we were on a trip visiting family so I was available 24/7. Fingers crossed that the rest of teething goes this well.

So we had our first road trip, the boys were awesome on the way there. It was a 12 hour trip each way, we rented a van to fit all of our stuff and so I could be comfortable in the back with them for entertaining and feeding along the way. On the way back they had one major freak out session, where they cried for a while. It was horrible, there was no place to pull over and I couldn't take them out of their car seats. It broke my heart to have them crying like that. I do not believe in the cry it out method at all. If my babies cry I comfort them. We have so much baby gear so flying would have been difficult as well, plus I am worried about them being trapped in a flying germ incubator at this young age. They will no doubt get on a plane, but I want to wait until they are at least 1.

The babies love their rice cereal now and will soon be transitioned to sweet potatoes/root veggies, we just want to wait until their 6 month appointment next week. They are so adorable eating their big boy cereal in their Bumbo seats or high chairs! Now that we've reached the 6 month mark, I am also going to slowly reintroduce soy back in my diet to see if they have a reaction to it.

They both love standing up while holding on to us and jumping up and down. They roll over both ways and army crawl or wiggle their way to whatever toy they want to get a hold of. It is so cute to watch them worm their way across our bed or the floor. They are well on the way to sitting up unassisted but balance has not been mastered. They do that tripod thing, where babies use their arms together in front of them to balance, but they are leaning so far forward I feel like I have to spot them very closely. Sitting up will lead to a whole new world for these guys and for mommy and daddy too. They're still sleeping through the night for the most part, they wake up on occasion, but usually a nice back rub or a cuddle will work to get them back to sleep.

The boys now steal toys from the one another, they interact all time. They stare at each other and laugh and baby babble. I think this is the beginning of their special twin language. They still enjoy exercising those vocal cords by screeching and screaming. At times I worry if they will hurt one another because they grab, bump, scrunch, pinch, poke and roll over the other. I guess this is only the beginning of having rambunctious little twin boys! Brothers...

We've been using the organic Boba baby carriers, as the boys get heavier and grab at anything and everything it is getting more difficult to hold them while doing things around the house. These carriers are really comfortable and help when they need to be soothed, but you need to make a bottle or do other things. If alone with the twinsies, we can strap one in and carry the other.

Astral has a hemangioma (red birthmark, collection of blood vessels under the skin) on the back of his neck, but it hasn't gotten any bigger in a while which is great. Hopefully it will start involuting soon. They go away on their own and are pretty much harmless depending on their location. They are really common in multiple births. Defy actually has one on the top of his head, but it is a pin point hemangioma and is super small and is being covered by his hair.

Their hair is growing so much!! It will be interesting to see how it turns out. We can't wait to find out their growth progression next week at the pediatrician. They are in 9 month clothing already and actually fit two pairs of 12 month old pajamas, though as you can see from the pics they are usually chilling around the house in cloth diapers only! They are happy healthy and have the most beautiful little spirits, we are thrilled to be their parents...

"Farm Friends"

During a recent trip to the pediatrician I came across an illustrated children's picture book titled Farm Friends. On the cover is a barn with a bright red roof and a tractor sitting on top of green rolling hills under a blue sky with three adorable yellow chicks in the foreground. To the side of this image there are cutouts of various smiling "farm animals" that serve as page tabs.

A flip to the first page and the reader is introduced to chickens. There is an illustration of a chicken on a nest where four eggs (presumably hers) sit. A caption reads, "A female chicken is called a hen. Hens lay eggs." The illustration to the right shows that the eggs have hatched and little yellow chicks sit where the eggs once were. The caption reads, "Baby chickens are called chicks. Chicks hatch from eggs."

The next page is the pig page. There is an illustration of an "oinking" pig behind a gate with a caption that reads, "Pigs live in sties." At the bottom of the page is an illustration of three happy pigs running behind their mother on a patch of grass with flowers growing on it.

Sheep are the subject of the following page. There is an illustration of two lambs skipping and jumping behind their mother with a caption that reads, "They love to skip and jump." Above that there are illustrations of a hat, a sweater, and socks with a caption that reads, "We get wool from sheep. All these things can be made from sheep's wool."

The next to last page is the cows' page. "Cows live in fields. They eat grass," reads the captions under an illustration of three cows grazing in a field guarded by a bright red fence. Underneath this is an illustration of a mother cow and her calf. "A baby cow is called a calf," reads the caption. On the opposite page a caption reads, "Cow's help us make all these foods, and under this are illustrations of, and captions reading,"milk", "butter", and "cheese".

The last "farm friend" we are introduced to is the horse. There is an illustration of a horse neighing with his or her head sticking out of a stable window. The caption reads, "Horses live in stables. They like to eat hay". Below this are illustrations of four horseshoes and the reader is encouraged to count how many there are.

This book is a perfect example of speciesist indoctrination. Not only is it assumed that there is no ethical problem with using these animals for human purposes, it is clearly a gross distortion of the reality of the exploitation taking place. And this is presented to the youngest amongst us. Children, the targeted readers, know no better, but we adults should.

Here are some examples of our "friendly" relationships with these animals:

Chicks do not hatch if we eat the chickens' eggs in the first place. Male chicks are often killed as soon as they are hatched and the female chicks live lives of constantly having their reproductive cycles manipulated before they themselves are killed for no longer serving a purpose to humans. Some 9 billion chickens are killed each year in the US for the taste of their flesh and the taste of their bodily functions.

Pigs only live in sties (or whatever confinement we put them in) because we humans confine them there. They live in confinement for one reason only; so humans can fatten them up in order to kill them and eat their decomposing bodies. Around 120 millions pigs are killed each year for the taste of their muscles.

The wool of sheep is their hair and they have evolved to grow just enough for protection from the cold or to keep cool, depending on the season. Sheep that are not domesticated do not need to be shorn. Regardless of the conditions the sheep are kept in they are all killed when they no longer serve their purpose to humans and their lambs are killed particularly because of the taste and texture of their flesh. Approximately 3 million sheep and lambs are killed each year in the US.

The vast majority of cows do not live in fields and even if they did that would not deny the fact that they are exploited and killed for completely unnecessary human purposes. The milk, butter, and cheese that cows "help us" to make are actually derived from a system of domination and exploitation that necessarily involves forced impregnation and the killing of unwanted (read: uneconomical) male calves after they, as well as female calves, are separated from their grieving mothers. The male calves very often become "veal", the flesh of calves. "Veal" would not exist if it weren't for milk, butter, and cheese consumption. 35 million or so cows are killed every year in the US alone.

Finally, horses do not naturally live in stables. Horses that are feral or have not been domesticated (a rarity) do not by any means enjoy being confined but rather would travel up to 50 miles per day. It is only when they are trained, or "broken", that they become pliant and obedient enough to be used for human service, enjoyment and amusement. Horseshoes are attached (commonly nailed) onto horses' hooves only so horses can be of service to humans. In captivity horses' hooves harden much less than in the "wild" and are more vulnerable to injury. And yes, horses are also killed when they no longer serve a purpose to their human "owners". Tens of thousands of horses are killed for consumption each year but scores more are exploited for mere entertainment, amusement, or obsolete modes of transportation.

A book like Farm Friends denies that animals, particularly "farm animals", have any value other than the value humans give to them, or have a purpose beyond the purpose for which humans exploit them. It denies that these animals have interests in not being exploited and killed and, in fact, it denies that these animals are exploited and killed at all. This is dishonest and untruthful but unfortunately it is a common tale forced upon our impressionable children from day 1.

It's time that we start teaching our children, who naturally have compassion for others, to respect the interests and intrinsic value of other animals. It's time to stop perpetuating the myth of human superiority to all other animals. It's time to stop forcing the notion of the acceptability of human use of other animals on our children because it's all unnecessary and, in reality, involves committing violence and inflicting suffering, death, and all the objectionable practices that we teach our children not to participate in.

It's time to put books like Farm Friends into the historical archives right next to the many other outdated texts that sought to normalize the exploitation of sentient beings and the privileging of one group at the expense of another group that has been deemed inferior. It's time to reject speciesism and go vegan. It's the truly friendly thing to do for humans, other animals, and the planet we all inhabit.